Tag Archives: Toddler

19th March 2015

10 Things Not To Say To A Toddler

Stanley1 – You say: Mummy is tired today, shall we  put on a film and have a quiet afternoon?”

Your toddler thinks: Quiet? What’s quiet? Does it involve a set of musical instruments, a cracker whistle, and three full-blown tantrums?

 

2  – You say:“Only 7 sleeps until our holiday!”

Your toddler thinks: Wow! I’ll fetch my bag! And then I’ll stand by the door crying until it’s time to go! I’m as excited as you are, Mummy!

 

3 – You say: ‘Mummy loves these shoes! Why don’t we put them on! They’d look great with your outfit!”

Your toddler thinks: I hate those shoes. If they come near my feet again, I will scream.  And by the way, I’m wearing my slippers to nursery this morning.

 

4 – You say:GET DOWN! THAT’S DANGEROUS!!!!!!”

Your toddler thinks: Brilliant! Dangerous is my new favourite game – and next time, I’m going higher.

 

5 – You say:Look at the weather! I think we’ll just stay inside this afternoon!”

Your toddler thinks: OK Mummy, that sounds good. I’m going to run around the living room at top speed until you decide to take me out anyway – and then I’m going to refuse to wear my raincoat and wellies, just to make it all more fun.

 

6 – You say:  “Look what I bought for your baby brother!”

Your toddler thinks: I need that thing more than anything I have ever needed before. I will not rest until I get that thing. It is the only thing that will ever make me happy. What is it, Mummy?

 
7 – You say: – “Come on, only three more mouthfuls and you can have some pudding”

Your toddler thinks: Give me the cake.

 

8  – You say:Why don’t you show Freddie your new toy?

Your toddler thinks: OK, I will get the toy.  But I will not let go of it for the next 45 minutes. And if he even looks at it, there will be war.

 

9 – You say:Tell Daddy what you learnt at nursery this morning!”

Your toddler thinks: I have no idea what she’s talking about. Is it tea time yet?

 

10 – You say: Can you help me tidy up your toys?

Your toddler thinks: Of course Mummy, but I’m going to make the game more fun by pulling out two new toys for every one I put away. And then I’m going to empty my building blocks all over the living room floor to finish things off before bed.



29th December 2014

Things my toddler has shouted “NO” at in the last week

photo1. The question: “Would you like to open some Christmas presents?

2. The satnav lady, who told us to turn left at the next junction

3. Father Christmas in his grotto

4. The instruction: “Please take that cupcake off your brother’s head.

5. A robin, who dared to land on our car

6. The question: “Would you like to play outside?

7. The question: “Would you like to stay inside?

8. A member of staff in Sainsburys with antler ears and tinsel around her neck

9. His favourite bedtime story

10. The question: “Are you having a fun Christmas?