2 – You must not, under any circumstances touch the plug sockets. I will police and protect the plug sockets. I can touch the plug sockets as I am two and therefore invincible.
3 – Mummy can hold you, but when I need to be picked up and cuddled, you must return graciously to the floor and keep quiet.
4 – Get used to being squashed. I like sitting on you.
5 – You can get into the bath with me, but you must not cry when I pour water over your head.
6 – They are my grandparents. You may cuddle them. But they are mine.
7 – You must not touch my food. Or in fact any of the food Mummy has bought for me. You drink milk.
8 – Mummy says I am not strong enough to pick you up. She is wrong. Do not cry when I do it.
9 – If you do something that makes someone laugh, I will do something funnier. Accept defeat.
10 – You can not, under any circumstances, touch the iPad. This is the most important rule.