10th February 2016

How to infuriate your sibling in a matter of seconds, by Wilfred aged 2

DSC_50671. Snatch one of his snacks from his bowl when he isn’t looking and run away with it in your mouth.

2. Lean over his shoulder when he’s playing a game on Mummy’s phone and jab at the screen repeatedly.

3. Wait until he’s built the tallest tower from his blocks – and then shriek with excitement as you knock in down.

4. The same goes for sandcastles.

5. Ruin a game of ‘hide and seek’ at a playdate by standing next to his hiding place and shouting ‘BROTHER! BROTHER! COME OUT!’

6. Walk casually past him clutching his favourite cuddly toy.

7. Grab the remote control and manage to switch off the TV when he’s watching Team Umizoomi.

8. Dare to go anywhere near his latest school library book with grubby hands.

9. Pour water over his head in the bath and laugh.

10. Interrupt him repeatedly when he’s trying to tell Mummy about his latest ideas for his birthday party in 3 months time.

11. Grow big enough to fit into a pair of pyjamas that he deems to be his.

12. Sit at the top of the slide at soft play and refuse to come down, even though he’s behind waiting for his turn. And when you do eventually slide down, refuse to move from the ball pit below it just to annoy him for a little longer.

13. Drink out of a cup labeled with his name.

14. If he thinks he’s won a race and shouts ‘I’M THE WINNER!” just keep repeating the words ‘NO I THE WINNER!” over and over again.

15. If Mummy says “No pudding until you both finish your tea!”, make a special effort to eat very, very, very slowly.